Listen to that little voice

I write this post today as I sit back, reflecting on the situations I have found myself in through various stages of my life and the decisions I have made, within my realm of influence, which in hindsight, I fought very hard to widen.

As a teenager, I remember feeling stifled at home as most teenagers do I guess. There was no valid reason honestly for me to feel that way – I had wonderful, loving parents, absolutely adorable siblings but I had this little voice inside me, that said to me every day – go away, find yourself, be with yourself. And I did. After a fair bit of upheaval in the conservative household that I hailed from, I managed to get away from the city and the house I was so used to. I stepped out of my comfort zone. End of Flight 1.

Flight 2 began when I had to take up work in another city. It was comfortable being at home, good to be with the family but I wanted something else. So off I went to a place unknown. All this while, I felt it was important for me to be rooted so I kept in touch with folks back home and took extra care to preserve my relationships.

Flight 3 was when I saw my to-be-husband for the first time at a friends’ wedding and listened to that little voice in me, asking me to go for it. I married him.

Flight 4, interestingly happened 11 years later. It was when I quit my corporate career to be with myself and to discover my potential in the world. I wrestled with that inner voice for a long time before I decided to pay heed to it. It won in the end.

Every time I have listened to that little voice in my head, I have felt this immense sense of freedom and lightness. I have moved closer to happiness and certainly never regretted it.

Choose to listen to that little voice inside you. Believe that it is your best chance at happiness. Always! 🙂

What is that little voice inside you telling you now? Are you listening?

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The definition of honesty

I find it amusing how each of us define honesty as per our own convenience. What is being honest? IThe cliche – f you resolve to never lie and always speak the truth, does that mean you are honest? I don’t know. What is the truth? If you feel something, is not sharing your feeling with someone who could be potentially impacted by that feeling, being honest? Is being transparent and speaking your mind being honest?

While we could each have our own definitions of being honest, as per our convenience, like I mentioned, what is most important is that we are honest with ourselves first. That is the toughest, sometimes, because most times, we don’t want to think about things which could bother us. We choose to live unconsciously and just go with the flow of the day, day after day after day after day.

How many times do we spend time with ourselves, confronting our feelings and emotions about things, about people, attempting to understand they why of it and then making time to take some action to help us deal with our emotions?

When was the last time you shared with your spouse or significant other a feeling or emotion you were going through about yourself or your relationship or something else? If you chose not to, would you say you were refraining from being honest?

While we can continue to spend our lives wrapped up in our ‘dailyness’ (just coined that one :)), we owe it ourselves if not to the people around us to spend some moments being true to ourselves each day. Some of us do this while we are commuting, some when going to bed and some in other places. The place and time does not matter. What matters is that we make this a discipline.

Choose to be with yourself – everyday. You are your only true eternal friend. The only one who can make yourself truly happy no matter what.

I can. I will. I am.

There are these moments in life when you are drowned in self doubt. You really want to do something but you know you have been procrastinating it for the longest time – I have done this primarily to not get out of comfort zone at times. But then, something in me, triggered action and pushed me or rather, kicked me and got me to just go do it.

It has happened with many things in my life. One of them has been with eating. It is not that I am overweight and have a habit of eating junk or cannot resist eating food in general but I noticed a year ago that I had become addicted to chocolates. I am a chocoholic – used to be, actually. I was probably born with a chocolate in my hand I think (get the picture? 🙂 ) It was one of those things I just had to do in a day – I would just walk up to my refrigerator (which was always stocked with chocolates) and pick one – small bit at a time, but yes, pick one everyday and eat it – at any time of the day – just like that. I was a slave to my desire of eating a chocolate.

I got a full health check up done a year ago and realized my cholesterol was on the borderline and could swing either way. While changing eating habits can never substitute the need to exercise, I decided to give up something I really cherished. I decided to give up eating chocolates because, really, I think I had had enough for a lifetime.

And I did. Just like that, one fine day, I gave up eating chocolates. It has been a year now. My refrigerator is still always stocked with chocolates (mostly gifted). I decided to put chocolates to good use. I usually use them to get my daughter to calm down when she throws a tantrum. It works wonders but she has a very limited quantity and only occasionally. I also use it to make my daughter’s friends happy when they end up having a fight or being upset.

As for me, I open the refrigerator many times, sometimes look at the chocolates but never pick one up. I have decided to not have chocolates so I don’t crave for them any more. You may choose to not believe it, but well, it is true 🙂

Also, I found, that this approach works with addictions in general – addictions of any nature. I have tried it with many other things..works every time and heard close friends and relatives try it too – it works for them too, so it’s not just me, for sure.

People who are trying hard to lose weight need to do just these three things – a) just look at what you are eating (ask yourself why you are eating what you are eating and what you stand to gain out of eating it), watch yourself for b) when you are eating it (what time is it? when did you eat last?) and c) how much you are eating (do you really need to finish the whole portion because you are truly hungry or are you doing this just because you don’t want to throw it away?).

I believe that all of us are smart enough. Asking ourselves these questions, each time, bring forth that power within us and before you know it, you will lose weight.

Nothing is as powerful as the human mind. If you decide you can, you will and before you know it, you would be doing it. It is just being conscious about what you are doing by thinking about it before you do it.

Choose to control your desires. There is an ultimate sense of power and self control in doing so which is unparalleled.

If you try this and it works for you, please do share your story with us. We would love to read it 🙂